Has anyone ever told you you’re really good at something? Is it something you already know about yourself or have they seen something in you that you haven’t noticed? It always feels good, doesn’t it? I would say, though, that having someone point out something you’re good at that you never acknowledged or saw before feels better than good; it feels AMAZING! It almost feels like the sky has opened up a little and the day is a little brighter!
The other day, I was talking to a dear friend about the things that make us who we are. We talked about how we all have gifts and talents that make us unique. Our gifts and abilities, or things that we are naturally good at, direct how we act and react to the world at large.
For example, my willingness to open the door for someone or stop and listen to someone’s problem is played out as the gift of empathy. I know an older woman who opens her home up to anyone that needs a place to land. She has the gift of hospitality.
One of the gifts my friend was surprised to know she had is the gift of encouragement. She will start up conversations with perfect strangers by mentioning how the color they are wearing brings out the blue in their eyes. She’ll thank the clerk at the store for doing such a great job after she witnessed her being berated by a cranky customer. My friend always thought she was just nosey and talkative. But someone pointed out to her that she has the gift of encouragement and has been using that skill since she was young without ever realizing it.
It made a difference to hear that something that she had felt must be an irritant to some was actually a gift to many! Talk about changing your attitude! Once that gift was acknowledged, she felt better about herself. It was like the flood gates had been opened and she suddenly felt like she was finding more and more opportunities to encourage others.
I know that there are days where it’s a lot easier to leave our natural gifts hanging in the closet or locked in a drawer. There are times I’m just too tired to be as nice as I should be, or my chronic pain has kicked into high gear and I find myself wandering through my day glazed and ready to curl into a ball, shutting out the world and everything in it. It’s not very easy to help others when you just don’t have it in you.
There’s not much I can do when pain that’s out of my control takes over my body. On those days, I just have to ride it out knowing it won’t last forever. But I believe that so much of our interactions with the world has to do with our attitude. Sometimes we need to make the conscious choice to set aside how we feel so we can better embrace how we should act.
There’s an old saying, “fake it ’til you make it”, that I’ve heard people use in the world of work. I think a much better use of this saying is in our interactions with those around us. The more times we are kind and use our gifts of generosity, the more of a habit it becomes and soon we’re generous all the time in all situations.
Wouldn’t this world be better if all of us focused on finding what our gifts and strengths were and used them every single day? There would be more smiles and fewer snarls. More doors would be open – figuratively and literally – to make the world kinder and gentler!
Try not to get lost in comparing yourself to others. Discover your gifts and let them shine! – Jennie Finch
