Finding My Tribe

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve come to appreciate my friends even more than when I was younger. Growing up, my friends were the ones that played all the parts in my recess musical extravaganzas. They were the ones who stood up for me when the boys were being mean. Friends were the extended family that filled in the gaps of school and chores. They helped create the fantastical worlds we played in.

With time, friendships change. In high school and college, friends are the ones that get you through the big break up, help to shape your opinion of life and allow you the freedom to try on new ideas and wear them around a bit to see if they fit into what you want your life to be.

Once marriages and children come along, my friends became my sounding board for why the kids won’t sleep at night or what’s the best way to potty train. We shared recipes, decorating and crafting ideas and answered the question, “does your husband do this too?” without judging.

I don’t know about you, but there was a time, as the kids got older and everyone went back to work that things shifted. It became more about work friendships than personal ones. The conversations were more about office gossip and the next promotion than those supportive, got-your-back ones I used to have. Don’t get me wrong, there were people in my work life that gave me the support I needed and I gave them support as well. I still keep in touch with some of my work family, those folks that I feel invested in, but it feels like I have room for more.

I’ve learned an important lesson. If all you have are friends with whom your common denominator is the company you work for, you are missing out on a true gift. As my corporate life has ended, I find myself reaching back out to the type of friendships from my younger days.

I’ve slowed down quite a bit. I like to take time to appreciate the clear blue sky and the crazy colors of my garden. I don’t have to rush off to the next meeting or finish a project that keeps me from quietly sitting with someone and just sharing life.

Friends provide the support and care we all need during this time on earth. The friends that surround me during different stages of life have created a wonderful patchwork of personalities, experiences and life skills that create this tribe of people I get to walk through life with.

Friendships are what connect us to true living. The saying “Live, Laugh, Love” can be found on various pieces of art around my house. The interesting thing is, I can’t really do those three things without other people. I need my tribe to live with, laugh with and show love to.

God didn’t create us to be alone. He made us to be in community with others. He gave Eve to Adam. He gave Abraham more family then there are stars in the sky. Even God’s chosen people, Israel, were made up of 12 distinct tribes, each with their own personalities and skills that together became a group of people with the common denominator of God as their deliverer.

We all need each other. If you’ve been struggling and feel like you have to do it alone, you need to know that is only a lie that Satan uses to keep you from being in community, to keep you from being a part of the tribe. Don’t believe the lie! Don’t miss out on lessons to learn and blessings God wants to give you through the love and support of others. Find your people, your tribe and hold them close. They will soften your hard edges, toughen your resolve and make you a stronger, better version of yourself!

Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.   – Helen Keller